Long Time No See

Thanks to Cap for keeping the blog going during the last two weeks. My apologies on being MIA. I decided that Hurricane Sandy was the best excuse yet to forego media of all kinds (blogs, facebook, twitter, internet in general, tv, cable, hulu, etc.). Sandy also knocked out the internet for four days. I spent most of Sandy and the past weekend curled up on the couch with Harry and a heating pad. I wasn't sick or hurt. I just really like laying on a heating pad. And by Harry, I mean the wizarding one. You know, Potter.

Despite all of my curling up and reading, I found myself surprisingly busy as well. For instance, I just spent the last two days in a strategic planning meeting with about 15 other women (wooooo...) for the museum. I then had to attend a Junior League Board Meeting (snooooze... when you're not on the board, its not very interesting) to make my provisional requirements. I sound like I know what I'm talking about, don't I?

I spent all day Monday and Tuesday thinking that it was actually Wednesday. Today, I keep thinking its Friday. I am obviously very confused.

I have also taken on some extra-curricular work that requires hours upon hours of computer work. But at $30/hour, I am NOT complaining. Not one bit.

So needless to say, all of this combined with a water spill on my dear, beloved Mac that found him (yes, personified) resting in a box of rice for two days means that I have sadly been unable to blog! Interestingly, I have hardly contemplated clever ways of murdering W for the past two months. Progress on this whole how-to-not-murder thing!

However, I did want to murder him and his school when I found out that we won't know his days off (positively assuming he will have at least one) for Thanksgiving until the Monday of Thanksgiving week. WHAT. That is ridiculous. I am not happy.

I also wanted to murder him and the federal government when I got another call from collections because our insurance company wouldn't pay for a medical related expense, and none bothered to send us a bill. Where's my affordable healthcare, Mr. President?

Sorry. That's not really a political statement. That's frustration with all of the promises of Obamacare of which this hardworking, tax-paying woman has seen ZILCH. Not that I agreed with it in the first place, but if we are all being "helped" by it, I would like to experience this help. Just saying.

But let's go back to how W is a 3rd year medical student, who is required to have health insurance to be in school, and so has to pay for it out of pocket since his wife (me) is lame and works for a non-profit that doesn't have insurance and pays her pennies. Let's also talk about how expensive this health insurance is each and every month. Then, let's talk about how it pays for NOTHING and then doesn't alert us to not paying for the nothing.

How ironic that my medical student husband and I cannot afford "affordable healthcare".

Off soap box.

So, the issue of days off for Thanksgiving and health insurance have been the only episodes that might have threatened the well being of dear W. Fortunately, I have learned to take out my frustrations in the kitchen.

Here is what I have been dishing up lately with links to recipes:

 (from left to right: jalapeno cheddar, plain, rosemary, lemon zest and gruyere)

I have made 3 loaves of this bread and will be making a loaf to take to my Junior League recipe exchange this weekend. (I know, I hate myself a little for saying that.) I have made cheddar jalapeno and rosemary, lemon zest, and gruyere. The latter is definitely a favorite!

I made this Hoppin' Johns inspired recipe. I wish that I had used smoked sausage or ham instead of chopped up pork. Other than that, it was a hit! I love one pot meals. I used 20 minute rice and frozen black eyed peas that I cooked beforehand.

Then, on the day that Sandy hit and it SNOWED in OCTOBER, I made this homemade tomato soup. All I had in the cupboard was a can of tomato sauce/puree and half and half instead of heavy cream. It was still delicious! Just add more stock/water if you use tomato sauce/puree.

My new breakfast of choice is a smoothie, and its delicious. Ingredients: half of a frozen banana, 8 frozen or fresh strawberries, 1 large handful of spinach, 1/2 - 2/3 cup of skim milk, 1 heaping tbs. of peanut butter, 1 tsp. honey, 1 heaping tbs. of yogurt. Blend and enjoy! I just started adding plain Greek yogurt. I am NOT a yogurt fan but wanted extra protein and the good stuff that yogurt has, so I started adding what I could handle. Yogurt unfortunately triggers my gag reflex. So far though, I don't really notice it in the smoothie.

If you like mustard greens, this recipe with onions and pasta is delicious especially with a side of kielbasa!

This is one of my favorite pork loin recipes. I make variations of it all the time. The most recent was this Sunday, when I made a pork roast in my dutch oven with carrots and potatoes. I didn't have white wine, so I used chicken stock instead. I LOVE lemon with roasted veg and meat. Yum.

So, who's coming for dinner????

-b

The Third Year

You know, when you start on this whole wife-of-a-medical-student path, you encounter lots of folks along the way who are undisputed experts on medical school (BTW) who enjoy nothing more than warning you of the extreme suck-factor of medical school. A small portion of these warnings should be heeded. The others should be immediately purged from your mind before their destructive powers take over.

Medical school does indeed suck. That much is oh so true.

Here are examples of some warnings you might receive upon embarking on a med school journey:

"You will never see him again. Ever. In your whole life. He will pay the bills, leave a mess in the bathroom, father your children, and yeah, that's about it." Thanks, I was worried I'd never get rid of him. Relief!

"Say your goodbyes now while you still have him!"

"Your apartment will smell like corpses for the first couple of months of med school." Natch.

"My sister's brother left her for a 21 year old nurse with a nose ring after she supported his sorry ass all through med school and residency. I hope your husband doesn't do that to you." Thanks, complete stranger, for your concern.

"He will leave you eventually. You know that, right?" I guess I do now....

"You're gonna be roooollliiiiiin'." In $270,000 of student loans. What. WHAT.

Mr. Sensitive

(source)

Then, there were the helpful been-there-done-that mature second year, third year, fourth year students, residents, and actual doctors with advice.

"First year will be tough, and he will study a lot. Get a hobby and make some friends." Yes, do this immediately. I am hobby-challenged and unfortunately left my friend-making skills back in kindergarten, so this little nugget was a bit useless for me.

"Second year will be hell. Boards will turn him into a phantom." This. Is. So. True.

"Don't hate him too much the first two years. The third year is so much better. There's more free time. You will see him much more."

"Fourth year is incredible. Just have fun." I'm excited for this one!

"He will disappear again for residency." But, he will be making money. I think I can deal. (Just kidding.....)

So, now, me, the wife of a third year medical student will give you my very own low-down. For whatever its worth, here goes.

First year sucked.

Second year sucked more.

Third year has been easier so far. Sure, we still spend a good bit of time apart (EM rotation took him away for night shifts), but overall, he does have more free time. He actually watches TV with me (AND WHO DOESN'T LOVE FALL TV, WHO? I DON'T BELIEVE YOU. TWO WORDS: NEW GIRL.). He doesn't lock himself up to study for 8 hour blocks anymore. He has a memory that mostly works. His appetite has greatly improved. We spend most Saturdays or Sundays together without study interruptions doing fun things instead of zombie-ing out on the sofa because he is in a study stupor and I am just BORED.

[Isn't it strange that boredom usually results in inactivity. Why are we so dumb? Cats for instance are never bored. Sure, they sleep 18 hours a day, but the rest of the time they spend chasing their tails, pawing at everything, attacking curtains, rolling around in the bathtub, unraveling toilet paper, lounging on kitchen counters and tables that they should know better. Cats have got it figured out.]

Jokesters.

(source)

Yes, we are poorer than ever. Third year has come with monetary obligations that we didn't expect or else just did a terrible job of budgeting. (Note: W's school has a statewide campus for third year, meaning that 95% of the students must move from Lewisburg for rotations.)

Learn from our mistakes/imprudence.

First mistake: Not budgeting for a moving company. / Not planning the move at a more convenient time for family/friends to assist (if you'd rather go that route).

We chose the moving company. You see, our families are in SC, and we picked Memorial Day weekend to move. I just couldn't do that to our families. So, the movers were really a necessity and ended up ($800 later) being a huge relief to both of us. Yes, it was nearly $1,000 to move us 1.5 hours, but it was two very tall flights of steps on both ends that W and I didn't have to wrestle our ridiculously heavy furniture up and down by ourselves. Also, I had to deal with our black cat, who hyperventilates, drools, panics, morphs into Satan while in a car. It was the longest 1.5 hour drive of my life. I had to bear hug her the whole time as she dug her claws into my thighs and salivated long, sticky, clear drool all down my front. AWESOME.

Don't do this.

(source)

Second mistake: Not asking W very specific questions about all that third year rotations entail. AKA Gas money has sucked our bank account dry.

For instance, I didn't know (I'm still not sure whether W knew this in advance or not) that W would be expected to travel up to two hours away for certain rotations. His first rotation was eight weeks in Family Medicine at a clinic 30 minutes away; then, his four week Emergency Med rotation was at the same location. This was a solid three months with a 30 minute commute (each way). Now, his geriatrics rotation requires him to travel 1.5 hours (each way) one day a week. I know this doesn't seem at all extreme, but consider our previous situation in Lewisburg. I walked to work every day and W (if he actually went to class) only had a 2-5 minute commute. We maybe got gas once every week-and-a-half to two weeks. Now that we have my brother's Jeep (because I was NOT going to be abandoned at work any longer), I shudder to think about our monthly gas expense. I would safely assume it has tripled since Lewisburg.

Third mistake: Higher cost of living.

I guess that we are complete idiots in this regard. We knew Lewisburg was expensive. We were paying $750/month for a one bedroom (all utilities included except electric, which several times reached a whopping $160, but was usually $50-$75). This is high for a town of 3,500 people especially when you consider the rowdy bar across the street and cattle trailers and gravel trucks (jake brakes always included) that would rattle past our street-front apartment at all hours. Our rent now is cheaper but no utilities are included. We easily pay more now than we ever did in Lewisburg. IDIOTS.

Also, there are actually like fun things to do here and more than 2 bars and 4 restaurants to choose from. YES, ITS TRUE. This phenomenon of having options was not considered. Big. Mistake.

Fourth mistake: Getting a 2 bedroom after having a 1 bedroom.

We definitely wanted a second bedroom since our families come so often to visit. Of course, a second bedroom requires a second bed. NO WAY. We thought treating ourselves to a new mattress was a great idea..................... And it was! I just wish we had budgeted for it.

Fifth mistake: Not considering the cost of all of the books and study materials--not to mention the insanely high cost of the board exam itself.

Nothing but a solid education (blah) is included in that $50,000/year tuition. Uh, DUH. We were only slightly blindsided by this one. Do your research. Study materials are freaking expensive. Beginning with second year, you should just go ahead and plan on spending $2,000 on study material and the board exam. If you are a DO student and plan to take MD boards, add another $1,000 to that amount.

If only it were this simple.

(source)

That about sums it up. I hope that this helps just a few of you or enlightens those of you who think doctors make it rain from day one.

-b

"Oh, no, it won't be long"

"It's gonna be a great day...."

Yesterday, I had a minor panic attack at Best Buy as I swiped my card to purchase W's birthday present (Oct. 19), and the card was denied.

Cue incessant mumblings and erratic thoughts ("That's weird." Someone stole all of our money. "It should have worked." Did W empty the account and run off with some skinny phlebotomist? "There's plenty of money in my account." OH, IS THERE, B? Are you sure? Of course I'm sure, mind. "Why wouldn't it have worked?" directed at the clerk who shrugs and rolls her eyes as I jerkily extract my phone and pull up my bank account, which, let's face it, is very unimpressive, but not completely devoid.), brow sweating, bumbling through my wallet as I search for a backup of which, I have NONE.

This is where I remind you all, dear readers, that W is a third year medical student and that I have been working for a non-profit since graduating from college. All of this equates to our 2002 Ford Escape being more valuable than our lives (plus all of our possessions) combined.

We are worth more alive than dead. I'm not sure, but I don't think that is a good thing.

Farmer's market spoils.

Now, I am not one to wallow in my depravity and all that, because, well, we have a roof over our heads. Does it leak? Absolutely. But its there and that's a whole heck of a lot more than what a good majority of the world's population can say.

Yet, I find it difficult every now and then to not look at our bank account balance with a sinking heart and feel as if we may not make it these 21 more months until W graduates living off of one very sorry excuse for a paycheck. But then, I look down at my feet to the pair of very nice leather loafers upon them, and although there is a hole opening up along the sole and I only paid a fraction of their original cost, I am reminded of the luxury I had to choose the color and style and the ability to buy them new and in my size.

Touche, reality.

I may balk every week at the ever increasing expense of groceries. How can I spend $120 a week at the grocery store and still have an empty fridge!? But, I am well-fed with food that I get to pick out and prepare myself. (I have an extra 10 lbs. in the general vicinity of my entire body to prove this fact.) It literally hurts me, searing pain burning a path down the center of my forehead, to throw that kind of cash at Kroger and continue to not fit into my skinny jeans, but I am sincerely grateful for it all the same.

Its hard to complain with a full belly.

I literally hate myself every time I pay our cell phone bill, but that doesn't hinder my stalker-worthy devotion to Instagram and Facebook. I worry that my withdrawal symptoms should the iPhone be taken away might rival that of heroin.

I mean, I can see pictures of Kim Kardashian's fish face whenever I want!! Thanks, iPhone!

Seriously, I will drive on gas fumes for days to avoid filling my tank. Then, when I finally break down and (God forbid) pump my own gas, I make jokes about cutting my arm and bleeding myself into the tank since it already has my soul. I tend to be the only one who finds these jokes remotely amusing.

Having to drive around in bulky hunks of metal that require fossil fuels makes me pine for Hogwarts. The ability to Apparate would come in real handy right now.

Thanks for nothing, J.K. Rowling.

My sweet, vintage fox bracelet.

The truth no matter how I present it is this: My life is really easy compared to some. I've got it pretty damn good.

If I want, I can watch the Kardashians every Sunday night (and, oh how I love to watch them) in air conditioning (or gas heat should I so desire) drinking a chilled beverage (Brita water, please).

I mean, I carry the Internet in my pocket.

Yes.

So, I think I will just sit back and shut up. In 21 months, W will be a resident. He will become a phantom husband, yes. But, no more medical school tuition! I could cry!

If medical school (beast that it is) has taught me one thing it is this: you don't get what you don't work for. Sure, there are people out there who get everything they want without lifting a finger, but I would venture to say that they constitute a very small percentage of people.

So for the next 21 months, W will continue to study long hours and pay thousands of dollars to gain experience and audition for a residency spot. I will continue to work for my meager contributions to our living expenses. We will eat. We will be sheltered. We will wear clothes. We will drive our cars. We will be just fine.

W and I will listen to great music and revel in the unity that comes from a dwindling bank account.

By the way, my card eventually went through at Best Buy, and I got W the perfect present. TAKE THAT, bank account.

PS - Paul McCartney is our joint crush, and this song was the inspiration for this post.

-b