From April
to September, I do little besides watch Major League Baseball. On good days, I
spend ten to twelve hours with the PS3 fired up on MLB.tv. On bad days, when
there are no day games, five to seven. It is glorious and magnificent and sad.
Little known
fact: there happen to be six other months of the year. I know, right? Mind
blowing. And during these six months, I do little else besides watch movies. To
be exact, and I will because I keep a Microsoft Word document detailing what I’ve
watched, since the first week of October, I have watched 241 movies. Please
don’t do the math to compute how many that is per day.
Here is a
darn near complete list of the eighteen or so best movies from the most recent
calendar year. That would be 2012 for all of you even more out of the loop than
me. Don’t see your favorite? Comment. I like to argue almost as much as I like
to watch movies and baseball.
So without
further delay, here’s the list. I had done many more, but whittled it down to
eighteen for brevity’s sake and because I only have so much free time. That
last clause was as a blatant lie.
18: Compliance
Watching “Compliance” was as an
uncomfortable viewing as I have experienced in many months. This is independent
film-making at its finest, features superb performances, most notably an
Oscar-snubbed Ann Dowd, and sparks heated discussion afterwards. Going into the
actual plot would do it a disservice, but the film offers an examination of a
situation that makes viewers want to scream out in skepticism. That it all
happened makes it even harder to believe.
17:
Goon
I expected to hate this
movie. And even after watching the
hockey-centric comedy, I’m not sure where within its meager runtime my loathing
transferred to something else, but it did. Thinking back on it, there were many
elements that I didn’t care for—the tacked on romance subplot, Jay Baruchel in
general—but something about it just worked. It’s funny, gives us original,
fleshed out characters, and features a spot-on showing from the criminally
underrated Liev Schreiber.
16: Bernie
Close your eyes and listen to
Jack Black as the titular character in this, and he sounds like he’s doing a
poor impression of Phillip Seymour Hoffman in “Capote.” Open your eyes and he looks like a toad with
a mustache. But I digress. “Bernie” was a fun, original distortion of the
traditional tropes of a real-life crime film, and featured some of the
cleverest editing of the year. Maybe not the best editing, mind you, but some
of the cleverest. How dare you try and twist my words.
15: Flight
One of the best scenes of the
year comes from “Flight” when, and cover your eyes if you would rather not know
the plane crashes, the plane crashes. Seeing it on the big screen, with
darkness surrounding me and a heavy set Asian woman’s breath on my neck, there
were few tenser movie-going moments this year. And that was just the first
twenty minutes. When the movie slows down, it is just as good, and were it not
for a story-telling choice during the film’s later moments, this would be much,
much higher on the list. I wanted to love it. Oh, how I wanted to love it.
Alas, it wasn’t meant to be for me and “Flight.”
14:
Argo
Though it has been taking home
many prizes for being the top film of the year, “Argo” left me wanting…
something. It was intense. Funny when it needed to be. And the climax was
worthy of a few clinches of the arm rest. When it ended, I was sure I had just
seen the best picture of 2012. And then it happened. I started to think back on
it and all of the little techniques within that slyly worked to manipulate a
viewer to feel a certain way. I’ll call this the ‘Ron Howard’ effect. Just
because a movie hits all the right notes doesn’t mean it’s a song worth singing
along with. I will watch it a second time later this month, and maybe my
response will be more positive. Maybe I’ll overlook some of the editing tricks
used to illicit tension. Or maybe I’ll
become more jaded. Let’s call this the “Looper” effect. I’m betting on the
latter.
13:
Smashed
Mary Elizabeth Winstead is an
angel in my eyes. Even when she is sitting at rock bottom. And rest assured, in
“Smashed,” her character is paying rent at that very site. And somehow, through
her natural charisma as a performer or my undying passion for her dimpled
cheeks, I rooted for her all the way on her path to recovery from alcoholism.
This is a minor story told in a low-key fashion, but sometimes, that’s more
than enough. Also, Miss Winstead got
robbed of an Academy Award nomination for Best Actress. But that’s a different
story.
12: The Grey
From the trailer, this looked
like nothing more than a generic action movie pitting men against wolves. As a
big fan of wolves and a big hater of men, I was all set to avoid this due to
having my rooting interests compromised. But director Joe Carnahan earned my
good graces with the under-seen “Narc”, and I’m giddy as gravy he did because
his latest film was way more than I could have anticipated. “The Grey” is not
an action movie. It is something entirely different and deserves to be seen by
an audience other than the one that gets off on ‘splosions and witty one liners after 'splosions.
11:
Arbitrage
No one likes people with more
than them. For example, I hate this hobo that hangs out at Big Lots. The people
who work at Big Lots hate the people running the company. The people running it
hate the people running the bigger companies. And the C.E.O.’s of those bigger
companies hate everyone. Due to this reason, “Arbitrage” does something I would
have thought impossible. It makes one particular big wig C.E.O. as despicable
as possible and, against the odds, also its hero. We actually root for him to
get away with a multitude of crimes and deceptions. This is a rare phenomenon and only partly
attributable to Richard Gere’s presence in the movie. #1980sdreamboat
10:
Safety Not Guaranteed
I cannot say how long this movie
is because I am too lazy to go look on the back of the blu ray and too lazier
to google it. But I can say that for the first, oh, 95% of it, I was liking but
not loving it. It was a quirky, fun little independent time travel comedy and
nothing more. And then the end. I won’t say anything else about it except for
no movie moment from this year generated the euphoria within me that the ending
to this did, and that takes a certain special quality. It wasn’t necessarily
what happened. In fact, the plot is really beside the point. I have seen it
twice since that initial viewing, and while it didn’t quite have the same resonance
as my first watch, it was still something special. “Safety Not Guaranteed” made
me feel absolute joy, and all jokes aside, when a movie can do that, you’ve got
something.
9:
Killer Joe
One of the quickest ways for a
film to weasel onto my good side is through the use of long scenes. Call me a
sucker, but I love them dearly. “Killer Joe” is essentially a filmed play, and
while the performances can be a bit showy at times, it just works. The team
behind it previously worked on “Bug”, another under-viewed gem, and here they
are clearly having fun. Never before has a group of characters been so, so, so
dumb. “Killer Joe” is violent, sexually
explicit, and features the greatest fried chicken scene in film history. It
also features a game performance from Matthew McCounaghey, who broke out in
2012 with four examples that he isn’t just a handsome Texan with a great butt.
8: Beasts of the
Southern Wild
Few movies are able to generate
the full range of emotional responses from a viewer, but this little indie which
could manages to do just that. There are scenes where even the most hardened of
curmudgeons would smile. Scenes where even the most evil people in the world, podiatrists, would become outraged. Scenes
where even the most robotic of robots would dry their eyes. At its heart, it is
a coming of age story seen through the eyes of a poor, imaginative you girl. This
also features one of the best scores of the year, and listening to hit has brought
a smile to my goofy mug many mornings at the gym. Please don’t judge me.
Everyone else already does.
7:
Silver Linings
Playbook
The elements at work in “Silver
Linings Playbook” shouldn’t work, but somehow, they do. At its heart, it is a
romantic comedy in the most traditional sense. From the opening scene on, the
end shouldn’t be unclear to anyone who has ever seen a movie before, but
through the unconventional use of convention, “Silver Linings Playbook” rises
above the customary trappings of the genre. Many of its detractors cite a
dishonest use of mental illness, but any such claim is falling into the hand of
the filmmakers. Yes, on the surface, *spoilers* love conquers all * but beneath
the surface, hiding in the shadows like a pervert in a trench coat, there is
far more on display.
6:
Moonrise Kingdom
Wes Anderson’s films have a
certain quality to them, and for some, it is a taste left un-acquired. For me, however,
his work is like rich, thick stew and I am just a thick slice of bread sopping
up all that delicious, hearty goodness. My metaphors may be jumbled. Either
way, this is Anderson at the top of his game, relying on a genuinely honest
story that just so happens to be surrounded by thick layers of quirk and
pretension. Ah, sweet, sweet pretension.
5:
Django Unchained
Upon my initial discussions
surrounding “Django Unchained,” I’m sure I sounded fairly jaded. I am always
quick to point out any and every flaw I have with a film, and while this one
does have its fair share of flaws, it has oh so much working for it that they
get washed away like bodies in the Hudson River. RIP Uncle Tito. The biggest
gripe with the movie is that there was just so much of it. Tarantino’s long-time
editor passed away before the completion of the film, and her replacement
wasn’t able to work their magic in quite the same way. Within the
two-and-a-half-plus runtime of this film is a two hour classic. That said, the
version we’ve been given is pretty darned good. It’s a throwback to
blaxploitation films and spaghetti westerns. Like hot dog chili on a pizza, it
shouldn’t work. But man, does it ever.
4:
The Master
Confession: director Paul Thomas
Anderson is a personal favorite of mine. I’d like to think that he makes his
movies just for me, but lets a larger audience experience it because he likes
money. Unlike his previous efforts, however, “The Master” isn’t as easily
digestible. It is tough to watch at times. Only one ticket was sold to my
particular theatre screening, so I didn’t have the luxury of seeing how an
audience reacted. If I had to guess, I’d imagine a raucous, popcorn scented
orgy. But I digress. The Master is something rare in American cinema these
days. A challenge. The plot doesn’t matter. The characters, their
relationships, their choices– the things that are usually so obvious in movies
are a mystery within “The Master.” It is chaotic and all the better for it.
3: Life of Pi
When I was in undergrad, I had
the bad habit of reading. This isn’t to say that the reading itself was bad,
but I would take a book with me to school early. An hour or so before my
classes started, and I would sit on a bench and read. Many, many, many times, I
didn’t stop until I had finished the book in one sitting, missing class in the
process. One of the books I read during this time was “Life of Pi”, but it
wasn’t in one sitting. You see, there came
a moment when I was so overcome with emotion due to someone dicing onions near me that
I was afraid of becoming a whimpering mass of machismo in front of a large
audience. So I retreated to my car and finished. So my expectations entering
“Life of Pi” were high, and while the movie didn’t recreate the experience I
had with the book, it was an amazing achievement. Sadly, home viewing will
never be able to replicate the jaw-dropping use of 3D seen on the big screen.
Never before has a story about a boy, a wild animal, and a boat been this riveting. Imagine
“Titanic” with Kate Winslet replaced by a bear. It is like that but not at all.
2:
Cloud Atlas
Near the end of “Cloud Atlas” is
a moment so obvious but so unexpected that I hated myself for not seeing it
coming and also was incredibly glad I was so naive. Many places have torn apart this film, and it
would be easy to do so should one be inclined. It is over-indulgent. But it is
also attempting something that has never, ever been attempted before, and while
the converging stories don’t all have similar impact, there are enough little
moments of bliss and grandeur within the film’s extended run-time to make it
worthwhile to any viewer who is willing to go in with an open mind and patient
enough to pay attention through what can feel like tedium. The movie may be
long, but there is no tedium present. Every frame has a purpose. For four
months up to the release of “Cloud Atlas”, I was dripping with anticipation. As
the final credits rolled, I was not disappointed.
1: Zero Dark Thirty
Walking out of the theatre, I
had mixed feelings of “Zero Dark Thirty.” But as the hours passed afterward,
something strange happened. I ate a sandwich and forgot pickles. Weird. Oh, and
something else, the movie didn’t leave my thoughts. And that is a good thing.
Usually for me, after a movie ends, I enter into nit-pick mode, tearing it to shreds
the way a dog would a head of cabbage while making coleslaw for a picnic. But
in the case of “Zero Dark Thirty”, it was as if the movie had cast this spell
on me. This isn’t a war movie in the same way that “Zodiac” wasn’t a crime
drama. Both take apart the conventions of the genre and create
something unique. This, like "Zodiac" is movie making at its finest.
There you
have it folks. Feel free to comment away or text Catherine with vulgar
derision. I am cool with either.
Also, I am
not nearly as mean as I look. And for those who don’t know me, I look like Sylvester
Stallone in “Demolition Man.” Fact.
